Have you studied?
One of the best ways I can believe you can prepare for marriage and to continue growing in your married life, is to study your spouse. What makes them feel the most loved? One of the best ways to start with this is to take the 5 love languages test! (More application with this coming soon in a blog post!) In the book, The Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman presents the idea that each of of feel the most loved 1 of 5 ways and we also have some tendencies that lead towards some of the other 4. Those five love languages are: physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, and receiving gifts. Keep these love languages in the back of your mind as we discuss different ways to bless your spouse this year!
The more you study your fiance/spouse, the more you’ll learn the little things that make them feel more loved, which in turn will help them to feel even more connected with you! Try to apply one of these ideas each week, mixing things up, serving them well, and learning what makes them feel the most loved!
35 Ways To Bless Your Spouse
1. Have their favorite drink (a cup of coffee, ice cold water, soda) ready for them when they arrive home from work. Present it with a big hug!
2. Do a little research and make a few calls, then take them to a restaurant you both have never been to before.
3. Write a verse of encouragement on a sticky note, then place it on their shoes or the mirror, so they’ll see it when they get ready for work in the morning.
4. Plan a date-night-in with their favorite movie or a few episodes of their favorite show. Pick up some popcorn and their favorite snacks to enjoy for the evening!
5. Walk up behind your spouse while they are working or cooking dinner and give them a back massage, letting them know you appreciate everything they do for you.
6. Wash and vacuum out their car as a way to let them know you love them.
7. Surprise them at work or at lunch time with their favorite food or snack.
8. Set an alarm on your phone and text your spouse every day at the same time for a week saying, “One thing I love about you today is…”
9. Pick one of the chores around the house that may not be their favorite and do it for them unexpectedly.
10. Send them for a haircut, massage, pedicure, manicure… give them some “caring for themselves” time.
11. Write out a prayer and leave it out for them to read before they leave for work in the morning.
12. Buy your spouse a new outfit and surprise them with a special dinner date.
13. Every day for one week, ask your spouse “What can I take off your plate today?”
14. Initiate a foot massage for them while you’re watching TV or laying on the couch.
15. Notice your spouse’s outfit and tell them they look great or what you love about it. (“You look so handsome, I love those jeans!”)
16. Stop in the rhythm of the day-to-day and ask how they’re really doing. Take a couple of minutes to pray out loud for them.
17. Point out a specific character trait you love about them and why you love it.
18. Take a simple walk together or go on a hike. Unplug from everything around you for an evening and just enjoy each other.
19. Find a book or devotional that you both can read together a few nights per week. Intentionally find time in your schedule to enjoy it together!
20. Write a small note telling your spouse ten things you love about them! Leave it in a less expected place so they find it and are pleasantly surprised.
21. Buy them small gifts to receive a few days out of the week with a little note to let them know you’re thinking of them. (candy bar, pack of gum, Sbux gift card, flowers, etc.)
22. Use Amazon Prime or go to Barnes and Noble to get a book they’ve been talking about reading!
23. Give your spouse the “gift of a moment.” Maybe you could grab a coffee and watch the sunrise together, or grab a snack and watch the sunset together.
24. Take the extra few seconds to give your spouse a back rub or small massage while you’re hugging, rather than just embracing.
25. Take note of something they did around the house that day and let them know how much you appreciate it and are thankful for the time they took to do that.
26. Send them flowers at work with their favorite color or have their favorite fast food meal delivered instead!
27. Pick a larger cleaning project around the house and make it your goal to have it finished by the end of the week without being asked. Things like cleaning out the garage, cleaning the baseboards, getting light bulbs replaced, etc.)
28. Write a sweet love letter to them and send it to them at work! You could also send it to your home if they are the one who normally checks the mail.
29. Describe your spouse’s character in ten different words on a note card and leave it for them to see!
30. If you read something or hear a song throughout the day that reminds you of your spouse, text them and let them know!
31. Notice a feature that you are physically attracted to and point it out to your spouse, letting them now you love it. (I love your big brown eyes because ___)
32. Offer to give your spouse a full body massage after a long day at work. Talk about stress relief!
33. Phones down, eyes up!! Tell your spouse that for one hour each day, you’ll put your phones and electronics in a drawer without any disruptions, and will spend that time doing ___. Maybe you’ll just sit on the couch and be together, hold hands and enjoy the quiet. Read a book together. Maybe even find new ways to be intimate with one another! Quiet time is the best!
34. Make it a point throughout the day to touch your spouse in little ways. Maybe it’s a little pat on the back as you walk past one another, holding hands in the car, laying your head on their chest, embracing them from behind as you cook dinner … all of these little physical touches can go a long way in making them feel loved!
35. Have a bonfire together. Or if you’re lucky enough to have a fireplace, an indoor fire. Fires encourage cuddles, and who doesn’t feel loved with cuddles? 🙂
I hope you guys find this helpful in displaying God’s love to your spouse in a way they don’t expect it!